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 Post subject: Dumbo McGumbo
PostPosted: Fri Feb 24, 2017 12:56 am 
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Don't worry about the title... it has nothing to do with the plot.

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Prologue

Alone... the last word she would ever think of was now her new reality. She had grown too old to stay with her parents anymore. Alone was a word that scared her, but empowered her at the same time. She had the freedom to do whatever she desired, but was without help or instruction for the things she doesn't yet know. She felt proud, but humble; courageous, yet terrified; relieved, yet stressed. These are only a few of the thoughts that were swimming around in her head, as it dizzied her.

This is what she felt as her hand grasped the door knob. The cold metal sent a shiver down her spine. She had opened many doors in her life, but never a door like this. This was her door, and it belonged to nobody else. She slowly twists the knob, hesitant to look inside, knowing it'll only intensify her independence... and loneliness...

As slowly as she turned the knob, she opens the door to her new Seattle apartment. It was dim and empty, because her belongings had yet to arrive. With her she carried a backpack and duffel bag with essentials inside. She was speechless, gazing into her new home. Collapsing her umbrella as she entered, she explored the vast empty space as she planned the location of all her furniture in her mind. After finding the bedroom, she rolls out a sleeping bag as a temporary solution to having no bed. She still had to wait until the next day before the moving people arrived.

Realizing it was only 6:00pm, she decided to leave her apartment for now and explore the local area for a short while. She grabbed her coat and umbrella and walked towards the door until she suddenly stopped... a letter was sitting on the kitchen counter. "Molly Baker" was written on the envelope with the logo of the apartment complex company. She opened the welcome letter and read the boring 'code of courtesy' and whatnot. Molly decided she'll go over the contents later; for now, it was time for her to explore a city completely new to her. She left her new home and locked the door behind her.

She didn't know what was going to happen, she never expected the events that took place shortly after her arrival, and she never would have dreamed of it either. Molly Baker's life would completely change. But for now, she roams the streets of Seattle.
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Thanks for reading my first attempt at writing a story. There's more to come, just be patient...

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-Looks aren't everything, unless you look like me.


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 Post subject: Re: Dumbo McGumbo
PostPosted: Fri Feb 24, 2017 6:29 pm 
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Great opening! Looking forward to more


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 Post subject: Re: Dumbo McGumbo
PostPosted: Sun Feb 26, 2017 1:13 pm 
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Curious if the whole story's going to tie into the title

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 Post subject: Re: Dumbo McGumbo
PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2017 7:46 pm 
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Chapter 1: Antique Addition

Molly wondered the busy streets, in search of something to put her mind at ease. The stress of being independent was severely clouding her mind. All of the things she had to do now that she was an adult kept pounding around in her brain. It was when she thought about paying rent that she noticed where she was. Pike Place Market was a huge shopping district in Seattle that hailed all sorts of local amenities. Molly stopped and gazed at the wondrous and enormous sight. Everything in each of the stalls was different and unique from the stall next to it.

Molly was awestruck as she passed stall after stall after stall. Suddenly she noticed a strange old man at one of the stalls. There was a sign hanging over the stall reading "Antiques". The mysterious man was wearing a dark cloak as he counted the money in his lock box. Molly was hesitant at first, but she slowly approached the stall.

As Molly approached him, he slowly began to look up. Looking into her eyes, he removed his hood and smiled. "Can I help you, Miss?" the man politely asked.

"Oh... I was just looking," Molly replied awkwardly.

"That's quite alright. If I didn't want anyone to look, I wouldn't put it on display, would I?"

She giggles, "I guess that's true." She thought the old man was actually cute, but not in a romantic way, but more of a sweet old man way that reminds you of your grandfather. Upon closer inspection, she could see that the man wasn't wearing a cloak, but instead was covered in a poncho for the rain. With her becoming more comfortable, she began to browse among the items lying on the counter in front of her. "What's this?" she asked, pointing to small blue figure.

"Hmmm... I'm not quite sure..." the man puzzled. "Forgive me, I have collected and discovered many mysterious items, and I sometimes forget where some things come from, or what they are entirely."

"Really?" she questioned, curious to find out more.

"I have traveled all over to find interesting items for my store, but I swear some items make wishes come true. I sold an old model airplane to a man once; years later his son comes to my store to thank me. His father had given him the thing for his 10th birthday, and that inspired him to become a pilot, and a rather successful one at that. A girl bought a necklace and returned to say she was now engaged. She's still married to him, and they have 2 beautiful children with a 3rd on the way. I have thousands of stories to tell about people finding happiness as if I had some sort of magic touch, but to go as far and say it IS magic... well, that's up for you to discover for yourself."

"Woah..." Molly said in awe, "I bet your life must be like magic as well!"

"I wouldn't say my life is magical, but it doesn't bother me. I enjoy hearing the stories of people finding success from my shop. That is where the magic truly is." He smiled, seeing Molly was enjoying hearing his tale with such child-like wonder. "You can have that little blue figure that you had your eyes on. Something tells me that you might find some sort of magic from it and have a story to tell."

"That's so sweet of you," she replied, accepting his offer. "I promise that as soon as the magic happens I'll come right back here to tell you about it!"

"That is very kind of you, but my time to share my story is growing shorter. I am old, and there's nothing here that can change that. Soon my stall will be passed down to my great-nephew, and then he will hear all the wonderful stories that strangers will share."

"Thank you, so much sir... I hope you'll hear many more stories," Molly ended not knowing what else to say.

"Goodbye, and hopefully this will help you with your worries!" He said as Molly walked away from his stall.

Molly decided it was time to head home. For her first day in Seattle, this place wasn't all that bad. She had completely forgotten about her loneliness, that is until she returned to her empty apartment. She stared at the figure she had just brought home, playing with it in her hands. She sighed and set it down on the kitchen counter. She picked up the letter she had previously opened and began reading it in full detail. The sudden weight of adult responsibility fell on her once again. She felt worse than when she first arrived.

With that, she continued to read the letter... unaware of the magic story the old man was talking about.
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Welp, that's chapter 1 all done and dusted. Chapter 2 will come out when inspiration hits me again.

_________________
-Looks aren't everything, unless you look like me.


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 Post subject: Re: Dumbo McGumbo
PostPosted: Sun Apr 09, 2017 12:50 am 
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So far so good. Your prose is quite good so far, I'm intrigued by everything. It's a nice start. I hope inspiration hits you again soon, because this is a good start.

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A regular citizen by day, author of strange stories by night.


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 Post subject: Re: Dumbo McGumbo
PostPosted: Sun Apr 09, 2017 8:44 am 
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Good job so far.

the character feels real, which is half the battle.

-HZ


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 Post subject: Re: Dumbo McGumbo
PostPosted: Mon Apr 10, 2017 4:58 pm 
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Chapter 2: Bright Blue

Molly stared at the letter in her hands and sighed, not that she planned on defying the rules, but the fact that there were rules, added weight. She suddenly felt overwhelmed, unsure if she was ready to live alone. Tears began to run down her cheek. Independence never felt like such a burden.

Alone... the word rang through her head. Alone... the word pounded against the walls of her brain. Alone... the word echoed through her whole body. Alone... the word twisted her arm and punched her gut. Alone... the word was all she could hear, all she could see, and all she could feel. Alone...

Suddenly a blue light had begun to glow on top of the kitchen counter. Molly hadn't even noticed; she was too caught up in her own emotion and stress. The blue figure suddenly began to hover above the surface of the counter. Molly squeezed her eyes shut through the tears.

"I don't want to be alone!" she cried, unaware that her wish was about to be granted.

The figure was now emitting a blinding light, and had begun to spin out of control. Molly gasped, finally noticing the supernatural sight in front of her.

Suddenly, the figure was so bright that all you could see was light...
__________________________________________________________
Thank you guys for all the support! Chapter 3 will be here at some point, I can't wait to get to the fun part!

_________________
-Looks aren't everything, unless you look like me.


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 Post subject: Re: Dumbo McGumbo
PostPosted: Sat May 20, 2017 12:30 am 
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Quick update, my computer recently got completely wiped, meaning that I will be set back even longer than I intended... I'm sorry I can't update regularly. I'll update you all as soon as I can.

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-Looks aren't everything, unless you look like me.


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 Post subject: Re: Dumbo McGumbo
PostPosted: Fri Apr 13, 2018 3:14 pm 
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Chapter 3: Cosmic Complications

As quickly as the blue light filled the room, it darkened. It was completely silent except for Molly gasping for air as if she'd just awaken from a nightmare. Molly peered around the room for some kind of abnormality; there was none. Just a completely normal room was laid out in front of her, aside from the same blue figure as before

Molly got back on her feet and slowly walked towards the blue figure. Before, the figure looked like a crudely sculpted person, but now it seems to have extra detail to it. Molly was shocked to see that the figure had changed to look like a tiny sapphire version of her. In addition to the changes, there was now a string that went through the top of it, making it a necklace. Molly turned on the kitchen light and held up the figure to the light.

"Weird..." she said aloud. Other than the blue light and change in shape, the figure was normal. "I guess this thing really is magic..." She glanced over her room again just to make sure that nothing else was strange. Nothing was out of the ordinary, just an empty room. "What does this mean anyways?" she pondered. "Maybe it's trying to tell me to believe in myself? Or something like that... Maybe I should talk with that old man again tomorrow."

Satisfied with her own conclusions, she turned off the kitchen light and went over to her duffel bag. Pulling out a pillow and a sleeping bag, she quickly set up her temporary bed. With that, she just tried to close her eyes and go to sleep, unaware of the true magic inside her new necklace.
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Hey guys! I'm finally back! I've got something neat in store for this story and tons of ideas! I have no idea when the next chapter will be, but I do plan on giving this story a proper ending. Thanks for waiting you guys!

_________________
-Looks aren't everything, unless you look like me.


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